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Your Lawyer as an Agent of Reality

Setting Reasonable Expectations One of the most important roles of a lawyer is as an agent of reality.  Lawyers should not promise the entire universe when all they can deliver is a marble size rock.  Clients should not expect lawyers to do the impossible.  Unrealistic expectations are bad and should be avoided. Clients need to…

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Stay Calm in a Divorce

Listening to What Triggers You A hot button or trigger word can be words, a tone of voice, or a particular way someone conveys body language that sets you off. Everyone has different hot buttons and trigger words that can cause them to become angry. When we are feeling triggered we automatically rush to judgment…

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Abraham Lincoln: Master of Conflict Resolution

Quotations from Abe Lincoln on Conflict Resolution Beginning as a trial lawyer, Ol’ Abe Lincoln recognized that trial work should be approached with the goal of settlement, rather than creating new conflicts. He figured out how to achieve that goal within the justice system.  We best know Abraham Lincoln as the president that lead us…

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Why Do Temporary Orders Matter?

Temporary Orders are important, whether in an original divorce action or modification.  The focus of this blog is on modification cases.  The reasons temporary orders are important are as follows: Temporary orders represent the decision of the court on the contested issues presented at a temporary hearing. Temporary orders can be a future indicator of…

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How Does the New Tax Law Affect Alimony?

When you walk down the aisle and say “I do,” the idea of getting divorced may seem unlikely. But if you do end up heading to a family court judge, exactly when you get your divorce finalized could have a big impact under the new tax plan. San Jose State University professor Annette Nellen teaches finance and tax policy.…

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The Marriage Booster Clause

Marriage booster clauses are clauses in prenuptial and postnuptial agreements that “boost” the marriage. In the marriage and relationship education (MRE) world, it is understood that all relationships can be improved through the learning of skills.  These skills are primarily communication, conflict management and other skills that allow for a healthy relationship.  For example, some…

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What to Look for in a Divorce Attorney?

The first thing is look for an attorney who’s not known to run to court every single moment anything happens. You’re going to need some protections, but you also need someone who can think a little bit. Many times, instead of a protective order, we’ve gone to court, and gotten a petition for extraordinary relief…

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Divorce and Finances

What About the Finances? One of the most Important questions to ask if you are thinking about a divorce is what about your finances? This is especially important if you have not been involved with the finances. That happens quite often, because there is usually one person in the marriage who is more focused on…

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When Is It Time For A Divorce?

Saving your Marriage vs Divorce Divorce lawyers generally think that right after the holidays, couples say they’ve had enough and they start looking towards divorce. I do think there’s some of that, but I also think that most people thought about it before the holidays and then they decide to act on it after New…

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